Relax

Well it is a 11:00pm and I will be sitting up for the next few hours with Riley because one of our awesome nurses is in Germany.....It has been awhile since I have had to do this and I can say that I do not miss it at all.

If I am honest, it has been a trying time recently with Riley, don't get me wrong she is improving and doing great, but at times it is hard. It is hard to understand why God has not intervened more than he has and why we still don't have answers or financial help from the government. It has been really weird for me lately.

You go through a lot of weird emotions and you start putting tons of pressure on yourself to pray more and anoint with oil more and then pray again more. I fell into this really huge rut of beating myself up when I did not spend a lot of time praying for Riley and if we were running late getting out the door in the morning and we didn't pray I would beat myself up.....The funny thing is with out even knowing it and having the best of intentions I fell into a works based faith. I believed the more that I prayed and did all these things the better Riley chances of being healed were......Like God needs my prayers to remind him of all the things he already knows she needs and that her healing was some how dependent upon my prayers......

The devil is tricky, here I am just thinking I am praying for my daughter because thats what she needs, but some how it gets twisted in my mind and I started thinking that my prayers have something to do with her healing....Now, don't get me wrong prayer is really important and God does listen and answer prayers, but his answers aren't dependent upon our prayers...There is nothing I could say or not say to get God to heal Riley, he will heal her in his time......

So, I type all of that to say this......God knows what you need, be careful not to fall into a works based faith....We need to remember that it is not because of what we do or say that God moves and heals, but because of what Jesus did on the cross and the minute that we make it about our works we make it about us and not about Jesus......So relax God knows what you need and is watching out for you.....I SAY THAT JUST AS MUCH FOR YOU AS I DO FOR ME

Josh